‘This is the non-stop train to Hull’
Yaaaaaaaaars!! Luke! Luke! Luke! Luke! Haines-o! Haines-o! Haines-o! L-M-H! (clap, clap, clap) L-M-H! (clap, clap, clap) L-M-H! (clap, clap, clap). And so it continues, mainly in that fashion.
I freaking love Luke Haines, and pretty much any old shite he releases is going to end up on the best of the year list.
‘I Sometimes Dream of Glue’ is very much not shite though. Sure, it’s hard to shake the impression that Luke had the rum old idea of writing a concept album about living in a model village some time around eleven, and then wrote, composed and produced the album* in time for writing sneering Tweets in response to that evening’s One Show, which by now he considers his real job.
(*Haines very much Princes It Up, performing pretty much every part on the record. These parenthesised sections usually have a joke in them, don’t they? Well, no this one, it’s strictly for information purposes. Is me explaining the lack of a joke, in a way, quite funny though? No, you’re right. No jokes. Move along)
That’s no bad thing though: ‘Glue…’ is funny, biting, clever and captivating. It comfortably skirts that fine line between disposable and essential that, if he’s being honest, is where Mr Haines is most happy. And stealing the melody of New Dawn Fades by Joy Division for a song called At It With the Tree Surgeon’s Wife is just peak Luke Haines.
Solvents Cure the Ego is an amazing song. I couldn’t think of a way to work that in…
Luke Haines: Everybody’s Coming Together for the Summer VS Prince: Sex in the Summer
Now… I used to freaking love Prince’s 1996 triple album when I was a teenager… I’d probably argue it was one of his most underrated… least rated… underest rated… but as an adult I’ve grown to realise a lot of the songs from it are dog ugly… Including a song I described as ‘the worst on any official Prince release‘… How good is it, I mean, really…? I guess we’ll know in 2036. The opening track is lovely though.
And now, introducing a new category to ensure we don’t have two pictures together, as that always looks weird:
The Auteurs: Child Brides
There are countless Auteurs, Black Box Recorder, Baader Meinhof or Luke Haines solo songs I could have gone for (I have mentioned how ‘After Murder Park’ is one of the greatest albums ever a bothersome number of times), but I’ve gone for Child Brides chiefly because it’s the one I enjoy singing the most
Very much a Jimi Hendrix/Bob Dylan situation
Yeah, that’ll do Luke
Fuck! Almost perfect!
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