18 Zeal and Ardor: Stranger Fruit

Mmmmmmmmmmlet’s talk about cultural appropriation.

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Zeal and Ardor are one of my favourite bands. In fact, I’d go as far as calling them my favourite Swiss band. They combine black metal with ‘negro spirituals’, the bracing gospel music sung by the black slaves in the early 19th century. What’s your initial reaction to hearing that? Are you OK with it? Are you straight up against it? Do you think that merely the fact that the band are Swiss makes any use of music born from American cruelties automatically cultural appropriation? Do you want to fnd out a little more about the band before deciding your reaction? Are you immediately against it because you assume the band is white?

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1 Perfume Genius: No Shape

L.O.S.S.L.E.S.S Generation

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(So nice of Lorde to let us reference one of her songs…)

This it it. the mathematically proven greatest record of 2017. And The Maths is in no doubt.

Perhaps you could argue that The Maths was so desperate to name an album that isn’t Lorde or Kendrick Lamar– a desperation foreshadowed by The Maths naming the Fever Ray’s album best record of 2017 before The Maths had even heard it (and then always being ever so slightly disappointed every time The Maths heard it because of this decision)- and actually conclude that ‘No Shape’ is actually just the greatest album of 2017 that isn’t Lorde or Kendrick Lamar.

The Maths appreciates that viewpoint, and The Maths is aware of how The Maths previously mocked Crack Magazine for naming Arca as 2017’s best album as obvious edgelord attention seeking. The Maths would understand if you accused The Maths of a similar exhibitionism if you were to listen to the Arca album– very good if overwhelmingly intense and rarely enjoyable ‘in the traditional sense’- and the knock-down genius of Perfume Genius’s latest– the most perfect combination of pop songcraft and overwhelming beauty you’ll have likely heard recently- and tell me they are both equally understandably considered the greatest record of any year.

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4 alt-J: Relaxer

Album of the Rising Interest

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Are you an ‘early adopter’?

By which I mean: when you adopt children, do you tend to do so when they’re younger? I would definitely recommend doing so: of the seven children I’ve ‘adopted’* the ones that were easier to deal with were the babies. I mean, seriously, those little things never ask for anything! Although I suppose, slightly ironically, if they could talk they might be able to let me know where they’ve disappeared to: I’ve not seen most of them since Christmas! I’m sure they’re fine though: Gradius is probably with them, he can walk and has probably learned English by now, so I’m not too concerned.

There’s also the secondary meaning of ‘early adopter’, meaning that you’re always into art, culture, gadgets and trends first. You had an iPhone before they were even invented; you were throwing pennies at Ed Sheeran as he was busking on the streets of Framlingham, hating him with a passion way before it was cool; you practically invented ‘Fortnite’, and could easily make a smart joke here because you’re 100% sure what ‘Fortnite’ is; you have a Smart fridge, a Smart Toaster, a Smart Toilet and a Smart Colander. If it’s ever happened, if it’s happening, or if it’s going to happen: you’re there first. Being first is the best, isn’t it??

(Ed Sheeran was really born and raised in a place called fucking Framlingham?? He’s the biggest pop star in the world: how have we let this happen?)

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11 Yeasayer: Amen and Goodbye

What’s the best song of the 10s?

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No, idiot, not the best songs of 10AD, as I think it’s universally accepted that the only music of that era that really holds up today is Ovid’s absolute banger Epistulae ex Ponto Bonko

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That’s where the term ‘put an Ex Ponto on it’ comes from, fact fans

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No, idiot, not the 1010s, though if we were then I would suggest Prime Tortoise of the Record Bureau, though of course you could make a point for anything in the ‘Four Great Books of Song’

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kane3

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35: Miley Cyrus: Miley Cyrus and Her Dead Petz

OK, now this is just nuts. Nuts in a different way to Holly Herndon perhaps, but absolutely no less nuts. These 23 (!) self-released songs made with help from Flaming Lips’ Wayne Coyne (who last released a decent album when Miley was 9 years old) has been called a vanity project by some, chiefly because it absolutely is one. But why is that a bad thing? Why don’t more pop stars strive to create something like this? Why doesn’t Leona Lewis self-release something as bonkers as a tender song about her pet goldfish being eaten as sushi which ends with her breaking down crying? Would Nick Jonah even consider releasing something as downright bizarre as ‘Milky Milky Milk‘? Why is such staunch anti-commercialism lauded in others but absolutely chided in Miley? And ‘…Dead Petz’ is frequently amazing and far more weighted toward cosmic beauty than the clunky attempts at controversy exhibited in ‘single’ ‘Dooo It‘. Yes, it’s predictably waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too long, and Miley is often trying fae too hard, but it’s largely a success and ensures Cyrus remains one of our most entertainingly insane pop stars.

‘Fun’ Fact: If I had a baby girl next year by the time I was Wayne Coyne’s age she’d be Miley’s and people would think it a bit weird how I hung about with her so much

What the hell am I going to sing in my X Factor audition tomorrow?! Twinkle Song‘ will break the judges’ hearts, even if the lyrics are absolute nonsense

Album Link