Firstly, am I allowed to say the name of this Jeremy Nutzman project? I feel sweaty. Like, really sweaty.
Oh fuck! They were adopted by a strict evangelical Christian album when they were young as well?? How much of that upbringing has rubbed off on them? Do I really need to watch my P’s and Q’s? As in do I need to watch my Prostitution and Queerness? They really don’t like that shit, do they? Mind you, they later joined the group Marijuana Deathsquads so, I dunno, they probably know how to party?
Are you cool, Mr, Velvet, sir?
No, no, no, you misunderstand me. I’m asking are you cool, you get me?
You cool? We all cool here? Alright…
*snorts ketamine out of the puckered anus of an eight year old trafficked Bolivian boy*
This is my kind of paaaartaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!
You know who wasn’t cool?? The CIA when they overthrew…
So, in conclusion, Velvet Negroni’s third album is an absolute delight. A delight that’s restrained and soft-spoken – like Patrick Stewart. What, you’re saying he’s not a delight? The fuck is wrong with you?! – but that nonetheless takes the music that it is never less than completely in control of to spectacular places. There’s a softly played intensity to Velvet’s music that I don’t think is captured by many other artists. It’s what separates them from the closest musical reference point, Blood Orange, as while Orange always seems to make music (in their solo career at least) that is resigned and melancholically sighing at a world they can’t fix, there’s a great anger repressed inside Velvet’s music. It’s a thrilling synthesis that I personally think the Caroline Polachek album could have done more with. Give me inner anguish, damnit! Give me the conflicting but just about repressed warring factions that are waged inside the human mind!!
But Mr Velvet don’t need my praise. They’ve already been sampled by a Kanye West project! They’re gonna be just fine! If they’re already hitched to the Kanye hype train, I imagine they’ll be fine, as you can always at least count on the media’s fawning over Mr West to…
Necessary Evil 