32 dvsn: SEPT 5TH

 

Yes, although your natural instinct is to pronounce the band’s name ‘divsner’, it’s actually meant to be read as ‘division’, much like those spent hacks MGMT insisting that their name is actually pronounced ‘management’

+22

 

Oh!

Should have said that in the Iggy Pop piece…

MGMT were far from the first band to use an acronym-cum-abbreviation for their name: it’s been lost to the history books that The Who were originally called ‘The WHO’ and it was an abbreviation of ‘The Weatherisations’, while Mötley Crüe was actually an abbreviation of ‘Möuntaineering Leylines Creates a Rüse’ and of course Led Zeppelin was an abbreviation of ‘Legally Underage Girlz Empprissioned as Sex Slaves…In…’

+34

dvsn’s (lower case name, which is freaking gangsta!) second album is one of the year’s most sumptuous sounding, and simply a spell bindingly cool collection of near faultless pop songs

+24

It’s cutting edge 21^st century R&B, and may well be the best album of it’s type (cough) this year. Unless there’s one I’m forgetting about…

+17

 

 

Oh, and he loves the sex, he does. dvsn’s three song types concern the singer either wanting to stick his willy somewhere, not wanting to take his willy out of somewhere, or simply rhymically sticking his willy in and out of something for four minutes. Watch and learn, Shagik <are you sticking with that nickname? Do you think it’s clever or something?- Ed>

+19

‘SEPT. 5TH’ (upper case album title! Even more freaking gangsta!) is even so called because, as you well know, scientists have proven that that the 5^th September is the sexiest day of the year

+24

 

 

Apparantly, when you want to look sexy in photos, you’re supposed to say ‘prunes’, but that can’t be right:

I stand corrected, I am one sexy mother fucker

+19

 

Bollocks, I thought about imposing this penalty before I even started writing the list, but either I’m not paying close enough attention or there just aren’t as many examples of it as I thought. A Humble Shag is when a singer opens his heart to say how much he’s (and as far as I can tell it’s always a bloke) missing a particular love, but he’s still careful to make clear that he’s still shagging loads of other women while he pines for her, less the listener forget how much of a freaking lad he is

 

Metacritic: +71

Length: 46 minutes +0

Right on the button baby

Best Lyric: ‘Stars in her eyes /She fights for the power, keeping time/She grinds day and night’ +1

Number of AMAZING songs: 0

Aaaah, but yeah, but y’know: There are maybe 4 or 5 songs that are just a fraction below sufficient quality to qualify for the Legit Bosses list, with masterpieces like With Me, Hallucinations and especially the title track making the list on occasion, so I’m still giving it

+10

…But Are All the Rest of the Songs Kinda Amazing Anyway? Absolutely +70

Is the last song just the first track but played on Ukulele? No -1

Total: 338

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