Hallelujah the Hills’ ‘DECK’ Ranked

All 54 Songs on 2025’s Most Insane Achievement Listed in Order of Awesomeness

OK! I’m actually getting round to this! I know I’ve promised to write this post several times but, kid, I make a lot of promises on this blog, they’re practically meaningless. Your Mum can relate, mate, trust me, now pipe down and read the rest of this post.

Boston’s* Hallelujah the Hills (HtH) first announced their plan to released ‘DECK’ in late 2022. By that point, HtH were fifteen years into a recording career that had produced seven studio records of that were all varying degrees of extremely decent to incredibly great. The band were hardly strangers to crazy ambitions and thinking outside the box: they had released albums inspired by 19th century spiritualist scammers; albums that were instrumental scores to a book about the importance of 1968 written by frontperson Ryan H. Walsh; and they once even discovered, on April 1st 2022, field recordings of clairvoyants receiving messages that proved the paranormal origins of many of The Beatles’ songs. I guess that last one isn’t really proof of the band’s eclectic ambitions, more their good luck in unearthing these 1958 recordings, but I still felt it was worth mentioning. They’d never done anything close to as ambitious as ‘DECK’ before though. Few artists have.

(that’s Boston, Massachusetts, USA, not Boston in Lincolnshire, just East of Nottingham. Just wanted to make that clear early in case you were confused by the rest of the article not making any jokes about Fred Maddison or wry references to  St Botolph’s Church)

In an idea that frontperson Walsh apparently had in mind for decades, the project would be called ‘DECK’ because it represented a deck of cards. There’d be fifty two cards. Each card would be a song. There’d be a ‘suit’ of thirteen songs in the ‘Diamonds‘ album (“a proper studio follow up to ‘I’m You’“); thirteen songs in the ‘Clubs‘ album (“lo-fi faster, punkier, dirtier songs”); thirteen songs in the ‘Hearts‘ album (“a sparser, mostly acoustic, yet carefully orchestrated, album full of weepers”); and thirteen songs in the ‘Spades‘ album (“a free-form, experimental record”). All four ‘suits’ would be released on the same day and collectively form the 52 track ‘DECK’ project. The listener would “Be able to pull 13 random cards, put their corresponding songs in the order you pulled the cards, and voila, you have your own unique version of the record that might function like an audio-tarot-card-reading“. It was, obviously, an hilariously overambitious folly that would destroy either the entire band, their collective mental health, or – most likely – both. It’s the kind of shit you’d hear sent Brian Wilson mad in Walsh’s beloved 1968. It’s the kind of thing you’d read about being an early plan for ‘Chinese Democracy‘ that finally convinced Slash that Axl Rose was beyond the point of no return. When Charles Manson first met with Phil Kaufman to explore the possibilities of releasing music, he probably described the ‘DECK’ project. The idea of this project is the rantings of a madman. I immediately begun to be concerned about the band’s collective cocaine consumption.

LOOK AT THIS POST, GIRL

Stat is to Be Done? Necessary Evil 2025 in Numbers

Yes, a lot earlier than I’ve usually pulled my fingers and thumbs out to do these statistical breakdowns of the previous year’s Necessary Evil list of the year’s best albums. I’d fallen into the bad habit of putting it off for so long, that it now usually acts as a semi-introduction to the nexr year’s list, which is pretty fucking pointless.

And this year I have come to the realisation that, ultimately, this whole yearly tradition is pretty dang pointless. Self-referential, divisive, needlessly segregationary, and of absolutely no interest to literally anyone in the world other than myself. It gives me a chance to make fun little pictures, but that’s it.

Which is why, what is to be done, is that this will be the final time ever that I list the stats of the previous year’s list. Especially since I started the (far more important, obviously) Gold Star Artists Hall of Fame (which will get its 2025 update soon), this twee and meaningless drag on my time simply can’t justify itself. After this year’s stats, I’m going to storm the Necessary Evil Winter Palaces and change the whole system for the better.

You might remember that I threatened this on last year’s stat breakdown but decided to give it one more run around because of one important factor: I honestly think that 2025 might see the UK beat the USA for the first time, which would be a great and extremely honourable way to bow out.

Also, I’m really running out of puns for ‘Stats’. And this is two years after I did a Fatman Scoop reference. Times are tough.

You got a ten dollar bill, get your hands up!

8 Hallelujah the Hills: DECK

Fucking hell, they actually did it.

In late 2022, Hallelujah the Hills announced an absolutely ludicrous idea: DECK. A 52 song project, with each song representing a playing card in a traditional… well… deck… Although it was announced in 2022, Ryan H. Walsh said that it was an idea that he first thought up the concept 20 years earlier, likely as some nonsense pie in the sky fantasy that would never likely be completed. It would be made up of four thirteen song albums, one for each suit. The diamonds suit would be the band’s a proper studio follow up to 2020’s ‘I’m You’ – the real diamonds in the rough. The club deck would be more punky and direct – clubbing you over the head, if you will. The hearts deck would be more slowed down and acoustic sad boi songs – that hit the listener straight in the heart…s. And then the deck of spades would be the project’s more experimental and looser songs – songs that… call a spade a spade…? Are influenced by David Spade…? Ah! A spade spade! For digging! So the spade suit would be the band digging into their creativity to express themselves more freely? Yeah, think that’s it.

Whatever, it doesn’t matter, this whole idea’s a fucking disaster.

Cauterizing wounds with lit cigarette

Legit Bosses: The 143 Best Songs of 2024

Hey, look, I’m getting better at this. Recently, I went on a massive cull of the 2024’s greatest songs to make this list as tight and as concise as possible, so that it would be sure to represent the absolute best of the best and would be as brief and easy to write as possible. And look! There are only one hundred and forty three tracks this year!! That’s a whole seventeen less tracks than last year! This post is going to be a breeze!

spoiler: this song is going top five. It INVENTED GAY POP, show some respect

OK, three weeks laternow, and I’m almost done! This post will be longer than most books you read, but to be fair most of the ‘books’ you read are Dr Who fanfic.

So, yeah, these songs are really good. And they get better as the list goes on. That’s how these lists work.

Here’s the YouTube playlist, which I know is the only thing most of you care about.

How much of an intro do you need, seriously?

A/79/232