9 Against Me: Shape Shift With Me

Honesty, this wasn’t intentional, it just so happens that music’s two most famous ‘chicks-with-dicks-or-maybe-not-we-don’t-know-and-why-is-it-considered-appropriate-to-debate-their-genitalia-it’s-not-like-Harrison-Ford-goes-on-Letterman-and-the-entire-interview-is-solely-based-on-the-precise-make-up-of-his-genitals-and…

Fucking hell… I’m starting this again, can you delete all that?


Honestly, this wasn’t intentional, it just so happens that music’s two most famous transexuals ended up on this list together, I’m not operating some bizarre segregation, and if you look back at the list you won’t see that I’ve grouped all the Norwegians, all the Bronies, and all the Abecedarians together


What happened, yeah, was that Yeasayer were originally 10th and Anohni 11th, until I decided that she perhaps deserved the top ten spot more, and another band


were in 9th, until I realised precisely how much I loved that particular fucking album, and so moved it up quite a bit and Against Me slipped back into 9th






In a strange way, singer Laura Jane Grace represents a much more progressive example of a transgendered person. As Antony, Ano… ANOHNI was already proud of her position as a queer oddity, and sung faggy songs about fisting and being born a woman, so it was obvious that a weirdo like him thinks he’s a fucking woman*!


Thomas James Gabel, however, was the lead singer and guitarist in a aggressive punk band, he probably downed pints of Stella before crushing the can against his forehead and burping loudly, he fucking rocked man!


He was always relatable, and the fact that she’s now Laura should go a long way toward normalising the fact that people’s gender doesn’t always correspond to what they were born with


The last two Against Me albums have also highlighted just how happy gender realignment can make somebody, that Laura Jane’s obvious ecstasy might validate Louis CK’s observation that transgendered people have identified exactly what’s wrong with them and changed it


I freaking adore Against Me, so much so that if this album were just a twenty minute recording of drummer Grumble Topswitch


throwing darts into his own backside it would still make the top 30


Like, not the cheeks, right in the anus


So the fact that ‘Shape Shift With Me’ is such an overwhelming success is just a bonus


against me

The album is perfect rock music. If you make songs using two guitars, drums and a voice, I honestly don’t think it’s scientifically possible for it to sound better than this


guitars arent dead.jpg


Metacritic: +79

Length: 38 minutes +8

Best Lyric: ‘If it’s what you truly want/I can wear her skin over mine/Her hair over mine/Her hands as gloves/Her teeth as confetti/Her scalp, a cap/Her sternum, my bedazzled cane/We can pose for a photograph, all three of us/Immortalized, you and your perfect girl’ +1

Number of AMAZING songs: 2 (+20)

…But Are All the Rest of the Songs Kinda Amazing Anyway? Yes +160

Is the last song just the first track but played on Ukulele? No -1

Total: 639


*Irony, for goodness sake

2 thoughts on “9 Against Me: Shape Shift With Me

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