Words are brilliant, aren’t they? Without them, we would never be able to identify things as the things that they, in fact, are

+27

Almost every human civilisation on Earth uses words, apart from the D’Hobriest Knark tribe of Southern Peru, who have developed the ability to communicate solely by charades, Blink Murder and Blind Man’s Bluff, as they hark back to a pre-bronze age time when humans used to talk exclusively through parlour games

+16

I know loads of words. How many words do you know?

+21

Like, you don’t have to totally accurate, we’re all friends here

+17

so I’ll accept a disparity of four or five either way, I understand that there are those painfully bland words like ‘cinder’, ‘lands’ or ‘sesquipedalian’ that everyone is likely to forget, so just get it in the ballpark

+34

Bollocks! Don’t just blurt out the highest random number you can think of! Even if you counted ‘dog’, ‘dogs’ and ‘doggydoggydoodah’ as three separate words there aren’t that many words in the language!

-3

You’re glad I haven’t got time to put you on the spot and ask you to list off all three hundred!

+32

 

 

I know ninety seven words. I’m not showing off, it’s a natural by-product of being schooled to university level. I was also brought up middle class so would naturally be exposed to a lot more higher calibre words such as ‘aubergine’ and ‘Yentob’, the kind of words that one hearing of would cause your average working class oik to squeal in delightfully sweet confusion and scramble back to the womb of the cotton mill, the only thing they understand

+23

Such an extensive vocabulary doesn’t come easy, and I’ve diligently taught myself four new words each and every year of my life, naturally forgetting one of the older ones. Last year I learned ‘arbitration’, which is a form of alternative dispute resolution, ‘hydrofluorocarbons’, which are organic compounds that contain fluorine and hydrogen atoms, ‘guggentokbiscuit’, which is word that I made up but probably has something to do with arable farming, and ‘arable’, which is land suitable for growing crops

+14

 

 

You want to know which word I forget? How can I possibly know that? How would that make sense? God you’re dumb

-3

Aesop Rock trumps us both though, as he has proven himself to know more words than literally any person in the world, ever

+12

Before you’re even halfway through the opening track on his superb 2016 album, you’ll find yourself reaching for the dictionary!!

-3

‘Terraforming’?!?! What is that?! Like, a really terrible formation!?!? ‘Foresight’?!?! WTF!?!?! Like, lookng at someone playing golf, or summat?!?! ‘Cherry‘?!?!?! LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLL!!!1!! Like, a hairy… a hairy… a hairy chump or summat?!?!?!?!

+9

(Wow, it’s… it’s too dark for selfies, isn’t it? The Gods are telling me to stop…)

 

I love ‘The Impossible Kid’. Honestly, look, it’s at number 24. It’s a dense , inventive and deeply intelligent piece of work, with consistently outstanding lyrics never less than matched by a masterful musical backing

+17

 

 

There’s so much going on here, and so many notable lyrical flourishes thrown out, that it doesn’t just reward but demand repeated listens, and even on the 7’876^th you’ll still be noticing cute asides like “Can’t tell if I’m a little withdrawn/Or a dead dog sent to quote-unquote ‘live on the farm’” for the first time

+13

 

Lot of wrestling references on this one

+51

 

Metacritic: +85

Length: 48 minutes -2

Number of AMAZING songs: 1 (+10)

…But Are All the Rest of the Songs Kinda Amazing Anyway?

Pretty much, yes

+80

Is the last song just the first track but played on Ukulele? No -1

Total: 479

Aesop Rock