Hey. Yo. Hey yo. You still there? Is anyone there? Is this whole list all just a tree having a manic episode in a forest when nobody’s there to utter the safe word? So you stop panic attacks with ‘safe words’? Yep. Pretty sure you do. Is this just the abyss at this point? If nobody’s reading, could I just, like, finally tell everyone that I was real Lockerbie bomber, and apologise that it caused a bit of a fuss? Because if not: no, of course I’m not, that was obviously a joke. But if so: yeah I did that shit.

Sorry, I’ve just kind of hit a brick wall. It happens every year, at some point I start to really question what the fucking point of all this is. Like, what am I actually doing? One time, I’m just going to stop writing one of these lists halfway through and never pick it up. You know how parents always like to repeat that “One day you’ll put them down and never pick them up again. And thank God, that fat little fuck is throwing my back out”? Well, one day I’ll just stop writing these lists and never start them again. And thank God, this fat little fuck is throwing my back out. Maybe because I’ve died. Spooky! I’ll be all afterlife and shit gettin ma ghost game on.

LIT