34 Mandy, Indiana: i’ve seen a way

Oh Mandy, you came and you gave me a turkey, on my vacation away from workie. Have you seen a way to a fucking caps lock yet?

I fucking hate Manchester.

Mandy, Indiana are 3/4 Mancunians, so they’ll get it. I was born in (Greater) Manchester. I now live in (central) Manchester. I get it. Manchester is fucking insufferable.

If you don’t live in Manchester, respect to you, you’re cool. Unless you live in London, then you’re probably worse, but that’s a conversation for another day. Cheers for your opera house lol pwned. Maybe your city is just as bad, I don’t know. Maybe if you live in Liverpool you swear you’ll choke someone to death if they mention the fucking Beatles again. If you live in Coventry are you literally sick to literal death of The Specials? Yo, where my Leith homies at? You’ll shoot me in the face if I mention The Proclaimers, right? While the Chief? Hmm? Puts sunshine on Leith? As they say? I’ll thank Him? Don’t you? For His work? As it were? And your birth? Yes? And my birth? Yeah, yeah, yeah? Isn’t it?

Did you know that, for a short time in the late eighties and early nineties, Manchester was arguably the coolest place on Earth? Factory records, isn’t it? Tony Wilson and things? Madchester? Which is the name of the city with the word ‘mad’ inserted into it? Really lets you know how mad the city was at that time, you know? Second summer of love? Fucking loads of drugs, mate, but we can’t mention that in our corporate synergy with the Aviva insurance company, not good for the Manchester brand, ya dig? Remember when the Stone Roses and Happy Mondays were both on Top of the Pops one time?? Oh, I’ve just realised that you’re in your twenties and you don’t know what any of these words mean, but you understand the vibe, yeah? Ian Curtis!! Yeah, he dead. Oasis!! They released 1.5 brilliant albums! Before you were born!

Did you know all this? No? Well, you’re in luck! Because Manchester will never shut up about it!

I think we all accept that Manchester was a pretty happening place in the late 80s. It suddenly became the musical centre of the world, the bands and music that were born from and were inspired by Manchester – dull indie pop suddenly brought to life by elements of dance music, psychedelica and a lot of MDMA – really pushed music forward and laid a path for the much maligned but arguably underappreciated Brit Pop movement. Tony Wilson termed the phrase ‘Madchester’, and I honestly believe across the board his influence is correctly lauded. And going back further, Manchester produced The Smiths (🤢), Joy Division and New Order pretty much concurrently in the 1980’s, three of the most influential rock music artists there have ever been. Yeah, The Smiths piss me off, but they were unarguably influential. Like the Nazis inventing methadone, y’know? Great shit sometimes comes from shit places. Shit can produce great shit. And, erm, I’m not sure if I’ll ever get the chance to mention this again, but Joy Division were the most perfect band ever and those two albums are like special messages from God. I maintain that Joy Division are that one band that have influenced a million others but created a sound that has never been properly replicated. “Neeeeer! What about Interpol!?” Seriously? Getdafuckouttahere!! There was The Haçienda, one of the most legendary music venues/night clubs of all time – I accept that – which Far Out magazine justifiably called “Britain’s greatest nightclub” (“Perhaps because it represents the importance of risk, the value of putting joy above profit, and reminds us that there was a time when music had real cultural clout”). Good times man, good times.

The Haçienda shut down when I was thirteen years old. And I am fucking old. Maybe move on? A little bit? No…?

Sure, Oasis represented a bit of an Indian Summer for Manchester music (though as committed Citeh fans they were never truly trusted by Mancunians, as they record talking heads from one of their many expensive London properties), but ‘Be Here Now’ was farted out in 1997. The Haçienda closed down in 1997. It was likely over far before then, but 1997 marked the definite and inarguable end. More than 25 years ago.

And Manchester needs to shut up about it now. The city has such a debilitating and strangling obsession with its own past that it’s embarrassing. It’s also bred 500’000 people to lionise the past instead of thinking about the present and even the future. Local musicians only become popular based on how closely they resemble one of the three archetypes: do you sound like The Smiths? Do you sound like Oasis? Do you sound like The Stone Roses? No? Well get the GTFO out, because that’s all we’re interested in. You know which act is huge in Manchester but not anywhere else? You know what our ‘local scene’ now consists of? The fucking Courteeners. Because that is what Manchester wants: tribute bands that remind people of when Manchester used to be a thing. Man/Madchester is now just a commodity that is used to sell the the streets off to the Abu Dhabi elite. Maybe if Manchester keeps repeating how good it used to be, maybe the good times will return and the council will be able to sell off even more of it! Come, come, come nuclear bomb.

‘i’ve seen a way’ is the sound of actual musicians – actual artists with actual identity – kicking out against that bullshit. Drummer Alex Macdougall doesn’t have a favourite Oasis b-side; synth player (synthist??) Simon Catling doesn’t have a hot take that, actually, ‘Hatful of Hollow’ is the best Smiths album; mastermind and guitarist Scott Fair doesn’t know Sally Cinnamon off by heart. You won’t hear any Madchester influences on ‘i’ve seen a way’. In fact, it’s difficult to find any influences. It’s a project that’s new and it’s fucking angry that you aren’t already a believer. The sound they create only occasionally classifies as music, it’s a sprawling and indignant nail bomb of destructive rhythm. It’s new, it’s challenging, it’s worth giving a fuck about.

Maybe the trick is to get a French singer, like Valentine Caulfield here? Singing exclusively in French? Is that the key?

Nah. I get the impression that Parisians are even worse than Londoners.

Like, you get it, right? You know what I’m talking about? You get it.

Metacritic: 79