Tag: fiction

7 Ethel Cain: Willoughby Tucker, I’ll Always Love You

~ Lex Leeson ~ 1 Comment

You’ll keep changing
I will stay the same
And turn the page
To find it blank
Except for my last name

Janie

Fucking hell, liberals, enough with the purity tests!!

[EDIT: Sorry, but I went to bed last night hating this post. I just feel it was all over the place, undecided on what to focus on, dipped its toes into saying something more important but wimped out of it when I was worried that it wouldn’t come across how I hoped it would, then the post just garbled about nothingness. I wanted to say things that were thought provoking and interesting, but just ended up with milk toast nothingness. I’ve left the final couple of paragraphs, plus the amazing lyrics, but the rest of this post can get to fuck. I’ll take another swing at the topic I chickened out of another time in the future. Fucking incredible album though]

LEGALIZE INCEST

11 Lorde: Virgin

~ Lex Leeson ~ 1 Comment

Today, I’ll go to Canal Street, they’ll piss in my ears

Hammer

Oh, wow, OK, to have such an honest admission on your album’s opening track is quite a statement! It sounds wrong to call ‘Virgin’ sex positive, per se, but it’s definitely Lorde’s most ‘sex aware’ record (counter to its title, I guess), and to ensure that it opens like this definitely warns listeners to leave their kink shaming at the door.

I fear that some of my oversees readers might not get the reference here, so think of this post as a bitesize educational supplement as well as the usual incisive musical journalism. Canal Street is about a kilometre walk away from my house, so I feel a degree of closeness to it to the extent that explaining the history and significance of the reference would actually be something of a pleasure.

If I’d had virginity I would have given that too

22 Little Simz: Lotus

~ Lex Leeson ~ Leave a comment

Simbiatu Ajikawo’s fifth appearance on The Only List That Matters™. Notable that she’s chosen to record this one with a different producer than Inflo, who has produced her last three albums to great critical acclaim. We’ll perhaps never know Simz’s underlying reason for choosing to switch up her sound at this point in her career…

Ah. Yeah that’ll be it.

I really feel sorry for your wife

27 Clipse: Let God Sort Em Out

~ Lex Leeson ~ Leave a comment

This is culturally inappropriate.

Wow. I am so impressed. This is quite an astonishing achievement after all this time. It’s actually really refreshing and – dare I say it? – inspirational for someone so long in the game still able to surprise us. The fact that I – Alexander Franchise-Palmer – can still highly rate this album despite the very public feuds that Pusha T and I have had in the past, is an incredible show of maturity and commitment to my unbiased reporting. Maybe there’s still hope left for us all?

“a website”: I have a name, you know??

And by showing how I’m actually the bigger man and appreciating how some things in life are some important than silly little rap beefs (which Pusha’s and mine most definitely was), this all kind of means that I won the feud, doesn’t it?

So, erm, yeah, suck it, Pusha T, choke on my hairy balls.

you were checkin’ boxes, I was checkin’ my mentions

30 Oklou: choke enough

~ Lex Leeson ~ 1 Comment

Right we need to start with some important points:

  1. It’s apparently pronounced ‘OK-Lou’. If you struggle to remember this, just imagine that you agreeing with the former Dinosaur Jr frontman that his later work with Sebadoh was actually up there with his best. I have, however, heard Oklou themselves not really give a shit how you pronounce it, because they lack fucking conviction.

2. Their real name is actually Marylou Vanina Mayniel, which, I dunno, sounds a bit like

No?

(;´༎ຶٹ༎ຶ`)

36 Mitski: The Land is Inhospitable and So Are We

~ Lex Leeson ~ Leave a comment

I have a hope and though she’s blind with no name
She shits where she’s supposed to feed herself while I’m away
Sometimes I think it would be easier without her
But I know nothing can hurt me when I see her sleepin’ face

Buffalo Replaced

Fuck it, right, Mitski? Fuck it! Might as well scratch that old dog at least one more time.

It seemed like the “21st Century’s Poet Laureate Of Young Adulthood” was so done with this shit after last year’s ‘Laurel Hell’. That album was the soundtrack of “what capitalism’s churn and enforced responsibilities can do to a person, how art is far from safe from being depressingly commodified and incorporated into the machine”. The relative ‘success’ that they’d so far achieved had done nothing and had meant nothing, so what was even the fucking point? Oh! And the last album their record deal required! See you later, losers! Peeeeeeeeeeeeeace!

I FIND MYSELF IN A SHIT POSITION

9 Tyler the Creator: Igor

~ Lex Leeson ~ 6 Comments

Why are you so frequently an absolute dick? Why do you find doing bad things so appealing, yet find admitting and explaining these bad things to other people so disagreeable? Why do you avoid being nice and doing simple nice things for people? Oh, that’s right, it’s just the way you are, isn’t it?

download (7)
“Giving a shit would be so out of character…”

 

And when did you realise that this was ‘the way you are’? When you were in your early 20s? When you turned 18 and realised that now you could legally buy alcohol there was really no need to grow as a person now you could just be drunk every waking hour*? Maybe when you were 13 you realised all the cool kids didn’t pay much attention to being nice and instead sniffed glue next to the school bins and talked about how amazing football was, so you realised that would be the direction to go in for the next twenty years or so. Maybe, when you were a six year old your mother rolled her eyes as she remarked how little you liked Brussels sprouts and challenging systematic injustices, so you subconsciously noted that was your personality. I wrote about the difficulties in truly changing yourself, or even slightly altering your perceived personality, in my Govier review, so, I dunno, maybe this post will just rehash those same ideas but just in a slightly less funny way. I mean, I don’t think it will, but there’s really no way of knowing at this point. It’s gonna be fun to work out though! MORE AFTER THE JUMP!! HIT THAT SUBSCRIBE BUTTON AS HARD AS YOU CAN!!! VALIDATE ME!!!! VAAAAAAAAAALIDAAAAAAATE MEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

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38 Equip: Synthetic Core 88

~ Lex Leeson ~ 3 Comments

I think we can say that we are now living in the post-truth era. If we’re not, we should still say it. That would make the statement untrue, which would actually prove that we are living in the post-truth era, Which would make the statement true. Though, since we’re living in the post-truth era, the usefulness of saying that we’re living in the ‘post-truth era’ is debatable, as the truth is no longer what we deal in. However, if I say WE’RE LIVING IN THE POST TRUTH ERA really loudly and marry it with whatever’s trending on Twitter right now (Josh Gordon, whoever he is) then perhaps you’ll decide this post is worthy of note.

giphy
Eugh, he’s an American football player?? I thought he was a real person

But when did we enter the era of post-truth? When were we pre-truth, when were we resolutely amid truth, and at what point did truth become a rapidly shrinking figure in our rear view mirror. Some say that the era started with that last paragraph I wrote. This is definitely a minority view however, as at time of writing I am the only person who’s seen that paragraph, and I certainly don’t believe that. Me stating that, however, is another good example of the post-truth age. What do you think of when you think of post-truth? Donald Trump and Brexit? Was 2016 the end of our often fractious relationship with reality?

Continue reading “38 Equip: Synthetic Core 88” →