Tag: communist party

13 Lambrini Girls: Who Let the Dogs Out

~ Lex Leeson ~ 1 Comment

The epitome of everything, I’ll tell her how I really feel
She’ll realise that I’m homo for sure
I like your face but not in a gay way
No homo

No Homo

Who! Who who who!!

Heeeeeeeeey, all you Dr. Who fans, that could be a new chant for you! Whenever the new Dr. Who episode about planets having the right to defend themselves (with genocide), or whatever, you could all chant “Who let the dogs out! Dr. Who, who, who, who!”! You can have that. Mind you, I don’t really watch a lot of Dr. Who, but I don’t think dogs feature too heavily in the core plot? Do they still have K9? Is that still a thing? You could maybe try to fit K9 into the song? “Who let Daleks out! Dr. Who, who, who who!”. That kinda works? Listen, it might need a bit of work, but I am officially relinquishing the intellectual property of that chant, so it’s public access now.

You know what mate, you stay the fuck away from me

14 Tyler, The Creator: Don’t Tap the Glass

~ Lex Leeson ~ Leave a comment

Welcome
Number one, body movement (funky)
No sitting still (dance, bro)
Number two, only speak in glory (yeah)
Leave your baggage at home (none of that deep shit)
Number three (nigga), don’t tap the glass
Roked, roked, roked l’Elohim
Roked, roked, roked m’Elohim

Big Poe

It’s Big Poe, motherfuckers!! ‘Big Poe’, obviously, being short for… Big Potential… because the record has such potential…? Big Poacher…? Because Tyler likes to illegally hint game…? Big Pochettino! Of course! Tyler is American, of course, and I’m sure Poch will appreciate the show of confidence ahead of next summer’s World Cup! Fantastic! I hope you cunts lose every game! World Cup 2026 is a vomit inducing sham and your fucking country should be ashamed of itself! Hate you all so much! Have fun!

The day before his sixth album’s July 21st release, Tyler, The Creator was at pains to stress how we shouldn’t expect too much from this shit! It was just an album! There’s no overlying concept, he won’t be wearing funny masks or bright wigs, there’s no unflinching peak into to the psyche of the millennial black experience, it’s just fucking ten banging songs!! From the opening of the album quoted above, Tyler makes it very clear that they’ll be “None of that deep shit”.

Fuck you and your dreams, stop playing with me

15 Perfume Genius: Glory

~ Lex Leeson ~ Leave a comment

It might not quite be as representative of the record’s contents as Ninajirachi, but the cover of ‘Glory’, showing the aftermath of a car crash that has flung Mr Genius through the window of his house and deposited him, broken and disfigured, onto the floor of his own living room. The crash may have just happened, it may have happened hours ago – days, weeks? – but it’s clear that Mr Genius has found himself smashed upon the carpet of his home and decided “No, no, I’m very happy slowly dying here, thank you very much”.

I don’t know is Mr Genius (known as Perfume Hadreas by his friends) has ever suffered a life threatening, completely debilitating injury, but I definitely feel that.

Broken apart and shinin’

𝟸̶𝟼̶ 16 Blondshell: If You Asked for a Picture

~ Lex Leeson ~ 2 Comments

How bad does it have to hurt to count?!
Does it have to hurt at all?!
I’ll come back if you put me down two times!
You try hard to make me yours!
But once you get me I get bored!
I’ll come back if you put me down two times!

Two Times

Aaaah mate, buddy, pal, 朋友, amicus, amiga! You might have dropped a pretty massive 24 places since I was charmed enough to name you the second best album of 2023, but – bah Gahd! – can you still ignite those cursed feels when you feel in the mood??

OK, step back, hold it up now, back it up – beep beep beep – re-rewind, when the crowd say Bo Selecta…

With Craig David all over your BOINK

17 Sharon van Etten: Sharon van Etten & The Attachment Theory

~ Lex Leeson ~ Leave a comment

Yeah, I know a bit of an ‘Alan Sparhawk With Trampled by Turles Situation’ – or ‘ASWTBTS; as we call it in the Journalism Business: I have also seen this record named as the self-titled debit album by Sharon van Etten & The Attachment Theory. At least in this case the album’s title is never just listed as ‘& The Attachment Theory’, so Ms Van Etten isn’t quite up there with Sparhawk when it comes to awkward album titles. However, ‘Sharon van Etten & The Attachment Theory’ is referred to by Wikipedia as “the seventh studio album by American singer-songwriter Sharon Van Etten” and – even more importantly – listed as solely a Sharon van Etten album on Bandcamp, so that’s what we’re going with.

Oh, and you shouldn’t capitalise the ‘Van’ in a name when you’re writing the name in full, only when you’re only writing the surname. So I will continue to call one of the greatest music artists of recent times ‘Sharon van Etten’, and Ms. Van Etten when I’m perhaps being more formal. Yeah, I know that Ms. Van Etten (see?) is American, and those fuckers don’t know how to fucking spell (see entry #26), but the least I can do is try and teach them how to spell their own name, no??

Someone inside me saved me

18 Disiniblud (Rachika Nayar & Nina Keith): Disiniblud

~ Lex Leeson ~ Leave a comment

It’s pronounced Disney-blood!! And look at that little dude on the cover!!! ‘NeverEnding Story‘ coded and I am fucking here for it!!!!

that wink is rather salacious and I’m not sure if I like it

Although – and I hate to be pedantic about this – but as we all know ‘NeverEnding Story’ was actually a Warner Brothers property, so how does that fit into the whole Disiniblud (pronounced Disney-blood!!!!) thing? Actually, I’m not sure, do Disney own Warner Brothers now? I know that everything that has ever existed in any medium is now owned by either Disney or Netflix, so flip a coin I guess.

[as is most (bimbo it out)]

19 FKA Twigs: EUSEXUA Afterglow

~ Lex Leeson ~ 1 Comment

OK, so how am I going to approach this? You know I really hate spoiling my own list, so I’d hate to perhaps let it slip during this post that maybe there’s another FKA Twigs album later on this year’s countdown. Maybe! Nothing in this introductory paragraph should be read as any sort of confirmation!! But you also know what a genuine and straight talking man of the people I am, and it simply wouldn’t be in my nature to lie to my wonderful readers that I love so much, and say that a certain album isn’t going to be featured… Or lie and say that it will feature!! Nothing in this introductory paragraph should be read as any sort of confirmation!!! People are calling me the most trusted voice in music. Everyone’s saying it. Sports Illustrated are saying it. I can’t abuse that trust.

I guess, all things considered, I’m probably better off just not mentioning that other album at all. That hypothetical other album I mean!! Nothing in this second paragraph should be read as any sort of confirmation of the existence of any other album!!!! That probably makes the most sense. I mean, it’s not going to be easy, considering that that hypothetical album is named in the title of this one, but hey, let’s give it a go, aye?

Continue reading “19 FKA Twigs: EUSEXUA Afterglow” →

20 Alan Sparhawk: With Trampled by Turtles

~ Lex Leeson ~ Leave a comment

OK, can we first talk about that title? I’ve mostly seen it referred to as being an album called ‘With Trampled by Turtles’ released by your friend and mine Alan Sparhawk. Though I’ve often also seen the album title itself being just called ‘Alan Sparhawk With Trampled by Turtles‘. Which is fine. But which artist released this ‘Alan Sparhawk With Trampled by Turtles‘ album of which you speak? Why, that would be Alan Sparhawk and also Trampled by Turtles

you’re never too old to post thirst traps

OK, so bear with me here, explain it to me like I’m a four year old child: we’re at the twentieth best album of the year, and you want me to write that it’s Alan Sparhawk and Trumpled by Turtles: ‘Alan Sparhawk With Trampled by Turtles’?? Absolutely not, how much word count do you think they give me for these titles?! Anyway, I like the idea of the very title of the record being that of the supporting artist, it really sells just how central they are to the record’s sound. Trust me, we’re going to have similar issues with the #17 entry #ReaderRetention.

Don’t take your light out of me, Oh my god, please

21 Moonchild Sanelly: Full Moon

~ Lex Leeson ~ 1 Comment

I’m a walking billboard, bunny
And I make a lot of money
Yeah, I make a lot of money
And that’s on period, honey
It’s all the travels, bunny
And chasing summer’s money
I do not flex, my darling
I’m stating facts, don’t worry

I got God-given cushion
And some God-given pushing
It’s your God-given duty
To appreciate my booty
I, I, I got God-given cushion
And some God-given pushing
It’s your God-given duty
To appreciate my booty

Scrambled Eggs

I was going to do a bit of an introduction for the readers with such spiritually impoverished lives as to not be aware of Moonchild Sanelly, but the opening track from ‘Full Moon’ pretty much sums it up. She’s speaks truths and is very successful doing so, and also has a natural talent (her bum) of which it is your God-given duty to appreciate.

Not enough? I can go as far as her preferred diet if you want:

You’re in pain, bitch , ‘Cause I’m paid, bitch

22 Little Simz: Lotus

~ Lex Leeson ~ Leave a comment

Simbiatu Ajikawo’s fifth appearance on The Only List That Matters™. Notable that she’s chosen to record this one with a different producer than Inflo, who has produced her last three albums to great critical acclaim. We’ll perhaps never know Simz’s underlying reason for choosing to switch up her sound at this point in her career…

Ah. Yeah that’ll be it.

I really feel sorry for your wife