It’s pronounced Disney-blood!! And look at that little dude on the cover!!! ‘NeverEnding Story‘ coded and I am fucking here for it!!!!
Although – and I hate to be pedantic about this – but as we all know ‘NeverEnding Story’ was actually a Warner Brothers property, so how does that fit into the whole Disiniblud (pronounced Disney-blood!!!!) thing? Actually, I’m not sure, do Disney own Warner Brothers now? I know that everything that has ever existed in any medium is now owned by either Disney or Netflix, so flip a coin I guess.
Speaking of ‘Disney blood’, did you know five people died at Disney World between October 13th and November 8th this year? They call it “an unusually active month”. The November 8th fellow was found dead at the Saratoga Springs resort; on October 21st a guy in his 60s suffered a medical episode at the Fort Wilderness Resort and Campground; and another elderly woman had a medical emergency at Disney’s Pop Century Resort on November 2nd and died after being taken to a hospital. The other two? Motherfuckers committed suicide! A woman jumped from the window of the Contemporary Resort (a hotel described on the Disney World website as an “ultra-modern” lodging featuring the “iconic A-frame Contemporary tower” and a “90-foot-tall mural by Disney Legend Mary Blair — responsible for the distinct look and feel of the ‘it’s a small world’ attraction”) to her death on October 14th. On the 23rd October, a man committed suicide at the same Resort. He was found dead by his wife.
Obviously, this got me curious: how often do people commit suicide at Disney World?? I mean… a decent amount, surely?? I dunno, other people with occasional suicidal ideations might want to back me up here, but it definitely strikes me as a very suitable place for it. Disney World could either represent an idealised version of the innocent childhood that you felt you were last happy within, or maybe you’re just a certifiable edgelord and the dissonance between Disney’s sanitised and consumerist play land and your grisly death is just too good to pass on. Suicide as Disney Land is, like, elite level shitposting. Well, I tried to look up the numbers.
First of all, if you even mention the word ‘suicide’ to Google it gets all woke and starts recommending the Samaritans and over nonsense. That’s cool, though you might want to also have a word with your AI and ask it to stop telling kids to kill themselves. Official numbers of suicides at Disney World are hard to come by, as Disney doesn’t easily release these numbers for some reason. You ask them about hot dogs and they’re all “We sell six million every year!!” but you ask them for useful statistics and the cat’s suddenly got their tongue?? Come on, Disney, all we ask for is consistency. The Wikipedia on List of incidents at Disneyland Resort lists five definite suicides, and a handful of other incidents that were probably suicides, but obviously not legally defined so. A 2023 article in DisneyDining.com reports that nine people have committed suicide at Disneyland Resort (“three have taken place at the Disneyland Hotel (1994, 1996, and 2008), and six have taken place at a parking structure on the property (2010, 2012, 2016, 2022, and two in 2023)”)… but also four people at Walt Disney World Resort (“one was carried out at EPCOT (1992), one at the DoubleTree Guest Suites Hotel (2010), and two at Disney’s Contemporary Resort (2016 and 2020)”)…? So, hang on, which one is Disney World? The Disneyland Resort or the Walt Disney World Resort? Are they both in Disney World?? Are there two Disney Worlds?? Whatever, let’s count that as 13 all together, plus the two that we can confirm happened after the article was published, and we have 15 all together since that pioneering guy from Santa Ana jumped from the Disneyland Hotel in 1994 and became the first recognised suicide there. Guy was 76 years old! Do you even have to make an effort to commit suicide at that age?? Isn’t there just a pill you’re prescribed that you can stop taking?? Man, being old sucks so bad…
Ciara Bogdanovic, Licensed Psychotherapist and Founder/Owner at Sagebrush Psychotherapy, told RadarOnline.com that:
Suicide tourism refers to the phenomenon when people travel to a distant location to die by suicide. People may choose locations based on symbolism to their life, popularity, desire to be away from loved ones, or the desire to make a statement.
For a person who is dealing with depression and other mental health issues, the fantasy of Disney is a place of nostalgia and comfort.
OK, but firstly: No. ‘Suicide tourism‘ is actually where a person travels to a place where some form of assisted dying or euthanasia is legal so that they can more easily kill themselves. What you’re talking about needs to find its own term. Back off, Bogdanovic, Switzerland is working this corner!
Secondly: I have long argued that what is widely referred to as ‘depression’ in most people isn’t actually any sort of disease. It’s a rational response to the stresses of capitalism. It’s a natural reaction to accepting that capitalist society promotes exchange value rather than human needs, and that you are living a life of wage labour exploitation. Yet when you get a little down in the dumps about that, the superstructure instead thinks you must be crazy and gives you pills to help ignore these realisations. Disney Land is the most extreme baby-brained playground of the Capitalist ideology, so you should absolutely get them to clean up your body.
Fuck! Yeah, no, absolutely incredible album.
2022 #21 (Rachika Nayar)
Based on four reviews that I assumed all mentioned the same things that I did, me being a fellow music journalist and all. User’s were not quite the same, giving it 73.
Shit! I didn’t even mention autism! Should I go back and add more?
Necessary Evil 